Plans Changed!

Well we are not going to move. I'm very disappointed but I keeping telling myself "things happen for a reason". And I'm holding on to that. My hubby backed out and then the plans just went down the toilet. This move was stressing out my hubby, my kids, my mom, and of course myself! We were all walking around the house mad. My mom and I were fighting over the phone. I think I had my arms folded across my chest for at least 2 weeks.

I don't blame anyone but myself because I had such high hopes and didn't really look at the REAL BIG picture. My hubby got scared. I just wish he would have told me sooner like before the plane tickets/hotel rooms were bought. My mom is pissed, and pissed enough not to call me on my 40th bday. I don't blame her I would be mad at me too!

My friend told me that I just need to let go of that dream of going back home because she doesn't think it will happen for awhile at least. She knows I have a hard time here but she thinks I need to give the Bay Area a second chance and not let people get to me.

I guess a new chapter in my life needs to begin so I can move forward. I've been at a stand still for a couple years now. Depression is knocking on my door everyday but my kids are my motivation to be strong. I do need to change, fix, and add to my life that is for sure.

Countdown starts

28 days to our BIG MOVE. Am I ready??? No way but it has too happen. My mom and step-dad arrives Dec 26th. They are going to help me drive up. My hubby is on the fence if he is going and let me tell you that is the biggest stress I have right now. I understand that he feels this is the wrong time financially for us to quit our jobs and move to another state. But I can't handle this place anymore!

Reasons why I'm moving:

1. Cost too much in the Bay Area to live....2 (900 sq ft) bdrm townhouse for $1200.

2. Kids next door are bad and they are teaching my kids very bad things. You would be amazed with what I have had to deal with these two gremlins next door.

3. Bay Area is just strange. I was on the bus with my two kids (they are bi-racial) and these 2 guys thought that was a pass to talk to me all rude. Then when I reminded them that I was with my kids and not to talk to me like then I was a RACIST WHITE BITCH. This was the last straw and the day I made the decision to move. I've been wanting to for a couple years but that bus ride was the camel that broke the back (is that the right saying...lol)

4. I MISS MY FAMILY is the most important reason!

5. My 18 yr old son needs me.

6. No family love in the Bay Area....hubby's family thinks we don't exist. My kids call hubby's mom DADDY'S MOM and they live 3 hrs away. They never talk to the kids. My mom calls pretty much every other day and talks to the kids every time. Yes I'm bitter, lol!

7. We live in Murder Capital....Richmond CA!

I could go on and on!

Wow a Stress-Free Thanksgiving

As far back as I can remember I've always cooked and/or cleaned on Thanksgiving day. Guess What.....this year I did NEITHER now how cool is that. Can you tell I'm still excited?

A co-worker was gone this week so I worked 6 days in a row. I'm a almost 40 kinda chubby (but still look good)waitress that runs circles around these young ones. Okay maybe not circles but I hold my own, lol! So my body was wore out by Wednesday night! I don't think I can do that again unless I got a massage every day after work because my whole body was in pain. Anyways, enough whining I just didn't have it in me to cook a big meal. I did asked the hubby last week to go buy that ready made Thanksgiving Dinner Meal that Safeway was offering but he didn't. I felt like if I needed too remind him 3 times he was telling me he didn't want to.

Thursday morning I looked at my hubby and asked him what the heck we were going to do for dinner. That look of "Oh f**k! I forgot to do something and she is going to make me pay all day" came over his face (which I don't blame him) and then said his famous words "I don't know". I of course rolled eyes and looked at him with my I'm not at all surprised you forgot but I will figure it out yet again but I really wanted to smack him upside the head and scream DOES ANYONE LIVE IN THERE. Oh sorry lil vent there!

I of course took matters in my own hands and checked to see where we could go out to eat. HomeTown Buffet popped on the screen and I remembered I even had a coupon. I told my family who were all still in pj's (including me)at 11am that it was time to start getting ready. We all dressed up in our cool clothes and by 1pm we were sitting in a booth ready to get our grub on. I could say I could have done better but to be very honest, no I couldn't! I got to have prime rib, ham, turkey, mac n cheese, mashed potatoes, black eyed peas/rice, rolls, green bean casserole and of course pumpkin pie. They had everything there. My kids even had pizza, lol. Plus it only cost us $35....bargain!

but the VERY BEST part was I didn't have to do dishes or clean up anything!!!!!

We ate good and then came home to watch movies and play Wii together. Will I do it again? Possible but not for a couple years. I do miss the leftovers today so no leftovers is the ONLY regret I have.

Next year BIG FAMILY dinner at my house.

Proud Mommy Moment

My son got a Citizenship Award last week. He was nominated by his class. I couldn't be any prouder of my 6 (almost 7) year old son. Up on stage I could tell he was nervous but he held that head high. I didn't even know he was getting the award until the day before so I re-arranged my schedule so I could see my son get his citizenship medal and certificate. Of course the medal is going in his memory box.

He went to sleep with the medal on for 3 nights. I guess he was pretty proud too! I loved every moment of this because his smile that he was sporting for days! The first person he wanted to call when we got home was his Grandma Jan. They have such a wonderful bond.

~Proud Momma

I do feel sorry for my husband...sometimes!

When I'm having that BAD month I'm a total WITCH w/ a B! This man has to walk on egg shells for almost 2 weeks. The week before is my head turning all around w/smoke coming out of it! He and the kids duck that whole week. I just have to give them that LOOK and they know not too mess with mom. I gripe about everything and anything this week. Everyone should be on their best behavior. My road rage even increases. Not good for the bay area. Second week its all about the pain and I'm a big baby that can't do anything. My hubby does take good care of me but I still complain. Then at night I feel so bad I cry and tell everyone I'M SORRY. I can't wait for it to end because I want my smooth, fun, happy self BACK. This doesn't happen every month but every 3 months.

If my hubby ever reads this I LOVE YOU and THANK YOU because you put up with a lot with me sometimes but I guess that's just pay back for all the I have to go thru with YOU....lol just kidding of course.

Obama and my son!

Little Man was really into this election. He didn't want to go outside and play he wanted to watch the election. He did the happy dance when the numbers were coming in and they were saying Obama was going to be the next president.

The next morning I was driving him to school and he tells me that he is SO HAPPY that Obama won because now he knows he can be president one day. Big Dreams I know but my son is bi-racial and having a African American president was a big deal for him. He is one smart cookie. I cried of course. This race wasn't about color to our family UNTIL he got elected and it was like wow that race barrier is no longer there.

My son's best friend lives next door and they have grown up together, okay the last 5yrs. This kid who I'm not a big fan of but my son loves playing with him. Well this friend tells my son that the white people are going to kill Obama. My son came in here crying and I was WTF. I told him to come in and closed the door. I didn't think much about it because I know this kid and just chalked up to him being his snotty self. His mother came over a couple hours later and just wanted us to know they voted for Obama. So....just because we are a bi-racial family do you think we voted for Obama because he is African American. NOPE. We voted for Obama because out of the 2 candidates he was the one who gave us hope and change is what we need.

I just had to vent that out...thanks!

Can't back out now

my mom and step-dad bought their airplane tickets and booked their hotel room for Dec 26th.
They are helping us drive back to WA. We will be staying in their RV for about a month until we can get our own place.

I have little less than 2 months to pack up and clean this house to move. We live in a 900sq ft house and we outgrown it about 3yrs ago. We are jam packed in this house with no where to go. It's time to MOVE. I still have to give notice to the landlord and my job. Dec 1st hurry please so I can get this over with. LOL.

Damn Tooth Cost Me $8.00

My son is one smart cookie so when I give him the $3 for his tooth the other day I told him that the tooth fairy will pay me back. He just looked at me like I was weird. Later that night he tells me he needs his tooth ummm why since I already paid you for the tooth. He told me that my $3 was from me not the tooth fairy so he is sure she will come tonight. Ok whatever dude! So we go thru putting his tooth back under his pillow and he goes to sleep. Hubby leaves for work at 5am and when he closes the door is when I remember I almost forgot again, ugh. I open my drawer where I keep my money and grab a bill then I slip into little man's room slide that under his pillow and crawl back into bed. Then at 6:30am someone is poking me and of course its little man with this huge cheesy grin on. I focus my eyes and he is holding up a $5 bill. I grabbed a five instead of a one.... oh geez! He got $8 for that tooth. I asked if I got my $3 back since the tooth fairy left him $5 he looked at me like I asked to give me his first born. Keep it then!

Sucks being the tooth fairy sometimes but just seeing that toothless smile makes it all worth it. But now I'm broke...can I loose a tooth and get some money.

I burnt Hamburger Helper...OMG

Now I know I suck as a cook! Yesterday, was a bit rough so my mind was just not on cooking. I FORGOT to turn it down to simmer and left it on high....ugh! I went upstairs for 10 minutes to spend some time with my hubby while he was watching the news. I came downstairs, yelled TIME FOR DINNER then went into the kitchen to make the plates. Turned around to the stove and looked in horror that the burner was still on high! Picked up the top and opps all burnt to heck. Damn Damn! Why does this have to happen to me....I almost cried. Ugh, had to call the Pizza Man because it was already 7pm. Hubby and Kids were not happy they had to wait longer. I didn't have anything else to make. Tuesday is grocery day so our fridge/freezer was empty. I can't believe I burnt hamburger helper! We don't even buy HH that much but it was a new flavor...Chili so I wanted to give it a shot. Well I guess next time. LOL!

I suck as being the tooth fairy...bad mommy!

My son woke me up at 6:30 am crying. He was standing there with his tooth in the baggie. In my head I was cursing myself...how could I forget to take the tooth and put money under his pillow. Maybe exhaustion is part of it but BAD MOMMY! So my response is "I bet the rain made it very difficult for her to get to our house" "I'll give you a dollar and the tooth fairy will have to pay me back" well he was cool about that because he took the money. But I sure did feel crappy!